Chapter Fifty-Five


Tour is over.

That statement never felt super finite, because we always had another tour planned around the corner. The time away to rest seemed to disappear right as I actually started to relax. Off again, this time for five weeks. This time six in a different country. That two week break you thought you had? Well we need to accomplish x, y, and z so it’s gonna be more like three days, sorry.

But today, the day after our first completed world tour, there is nothing set on the horizon. There is no feeling of “enjoy your six weeks off, because then you’ll be swamped again.” There is no timeline.

There’s just...nothing.

It’s very strange. It’s a very weird but exciting unknown.

Granted, we will still be busy for the rest of the year. It is Christmas time after all!  :)

And we will be writing and working on new music next year, so it’s not like we’re going to fall off the face of the planet.

But we’ll be home!

Touring has always been a major part of our careers, and to me it has been equally the highlight and the bane of my existence at times, haha.

This particular year I enjoyed much more than any other before, and that was largely in part to the people that were with us. Our crew was phenomenal and so quickly became dear to my heart. I am the saddest to leave them, because we have absolutely became a family over the years. We were joking last night that it felt like college, and now we were all going separate ways.

Tour was kind of my “college” years, in a way.

I honestly still can’t picture not having the same type of years I have had since being in this group.

I can’t imagine actually being able to do all the things I always complained about not having time for.

I think I’ll drive Jeremy crazy, bahaha. I may get a little stir-crazy, myself.

But I do have a lot I want to accomplish personally next year, as well as with the group.

2016 was such a wonderful year for my growth. It was so good to me in so many ways.

I want to top that in 2017.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, so I think we should all share what we’re thankful for. I know the year was dark in some ways, but it doesn’t have to squelch your light. You just might have to shine a little brighter. <3

I am thankful for my family and their everlasting support.

I am thankful for hitting rock bottom and flying high and proud all within the span of twelve months.

I am thankful to have learned when to breathe and relax into the motions. To enjoy something I would have normally been incredibly paranoid about. To have more patience.

I am thankful for my confidence. I am thankful to have found the girl that will stand up for herself and not let others so easily put her down. I am thankful to have found peace in that.

I am thankful to my friends and loved ones who have shown me that. Who have inspired me.

I am thankful for you.

I am thankful for your honestly, your sincerity, your counter arguments. I am thankful that you took this journey with me when it started from words on a notebook to now fifty-five chapters. I am thankful for all the support and love you give us every day.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.



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